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Update: How Do I Get My Wife To Stop Withholding Sex?

December 12, 2009

Dear Dr. Lulzington,

This is “Frustrated in Frankfort”, who wrote to you a couple of months ago because my wife was withholding sex. It turned out that she was cheating on me – with YOU! Remember?

I was so mad at first, but when I came over to confront the both of you, we wound up having my first ever threesome. It was the best sex my wife and I have ever had! Our sex life has been so great ever since. Our motto is “The more, the merrier!” Next time you’re around here, come on by! We’ll leave the door open for you.

xoxo

No Longer Frustrated In Frankfort.

Dear No Longer Frustrated,

*sniff* You see, people? This is how Dr. Lulzington knows he is right every time. It makes Dr. L so happy to improve the lives of others.

Although I can’t say I remember either of you. Dr. Lulzington tends to black out. Can you send some pictures? 😉 😛


Disclaimer

I am a humorist, not a doctor (though I do impersonate one in this column). I’m not even a peer counselor. This is simply my concept of what an advice column would look like if it was run by a morally bankrupt quack psychologist. Any advice given on this site is to be taken at your own risk, or better yet, not taken at all. I am not responsible if you are crazy enough to think that Dr. Lulzington can solve your problems. He will probably make them far, far worse.

You may have fun imagining what would happen, though.

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3 Comments
  1. chikkijaxun permalink

    I’m impressed Dr. L, it looks like you come/cum highly recommended. Me and my bf are starting to get bored in the bed, are you coming into Canada anytime soon? We definitely would like to start out with some hot webcam sex and go from there. Interested? Do you like dildos and Doritos?

  2. SayNoToPaula permalink

    *sigh* I love happy endings like this.

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